On breastfeeding
January 28, 2010
I'm back at work now, and the "breastfeeding" continues - i'm pumping the boobies 3 times a day, including all the sterilizing everything in the work kitchen. This has resulted in many conversations in the kitchen, with various working fathers and mothers, on the political world of formula versus breastmilk, and some awful first hand stories of how ashamed they were of not doing 100% breastmilk.
I think it would be good to have more public statements from mothers who did less than 100% breastmilk - you do the best you can, and formula is not the evil some people think it is.
Some people can't, because of milk supply, or they have to work to pay the rent, and I'd like to see more support of those that don't achieve 100% breastfeeding.
If you post a question or statement online (like this blog post) on formula you attract comments/replies, including some reasonable and helpful ones, but also including the "you can tell my kids are breastfed because they didn't die from cot death" statements, and other loveliness. Being a new parent is full of worry, so these eat away at anyone's confidence and selfworth.
We've chosen to do as much breastmilk as possible, but there's a choice we've made to use formula. There are government funded campaigns to ensure that any mother who does that feels as much guilt as can be instilled via national advert campaign on multiple media.
For example, it's safer for Casey's dad to take sterialized warm water and a packet of powder with him out of the house, than to take a bottle of breastmilk that will slowly warm up and bacteria multiply.
I also very sure that the statistics on breastfeeding (and studies based on those statistics) are getting it wrong. The midwife, plunket and a GP all recorded Casey as 100% breastfed, and she's not. They are very quick to write that down without asking too much - that coupled with the shame and guilt instilled in parents who use formula means they're less likely to be corrected.
I want actual scientific method studies to reach my own decision. I'm still doing research on what the actual difference is. There are a few studies that show no statistically significant difference between those full breastfed, and those only partically. There are studies that show all manner of advantages to breastmilk, heralding it as the cure all of everything, and then attempts to independant verify those studies have never happened, or show different results. The only thing that appears scientifically proven is easier digestion. Please note i'm still looking for more info, and my primary source is studies published online.
The most commonly repeated claim, is that breastfeeding results in a higher IQ. A study in 2005 in the USA tried to verify these claims using siblings to try and remove other factors that influence the results. Here's a quote from that study
Despite an enormous literature demonstrating better health and cognitive outcomes among breastfed children, the effects of breastfeeding are uncertain. This is because the vast majority of studies share a common weakness: they are nonexperimental. Their Achilles heel is selection bias. If a variable influences both the decision to breastfeed and the child outcome being studied, then omitting it produces a spurious correlation between breastfeeding and the outcome. For example, worse outcomes among children of younger, less educated, lower-income, and African-American mothers may correlate with their lower breastfeeding rates but be owed partly to disadvantages that cannot be captured in the regressions.
In other words: Those mothers that don't breastfeed have many other things in common, such as low income and less education. These factors can correlate with the child's ability to perform well in an IQ test or not. (i'm unconvinced that IQ tests are good measure of intelligence, but i'll save that for another post).
There is the UN/World Health Organisation statement that "breast is best", and New Zealand has signed up to this.
There was a time, long long ago (aka before the 1980s) when breastfeeding in public was not a right, and breastfeeding in the workplace was never tolerated. It became a feminist issue to regain the right to breastfeed. That battle continues and I wholeheartedly support this, especially for those that breastfeed way beyond 6months. We need to not make mothers feel ashamed breastfeeding a 2 year old in a cafe. It's their choice so either support or butt out.
It's also important to remember this is a political and cultural campaign - at some stage it turned into pseudo-science, in which any study that shows a slight benefit in breastmilk was heralded loudly, and any study that was inconclusive or disagreed was left quiet. These selective studies are used well to lobby for the right to breastfeed - but at the cost of shame for those that don't.
We live in New Zealand, and have a some of the cleanest watersupply in the world. This is important as many studies compare breastmilk with formula made from contaminated water - or prepared with less than enough powder because of the high costs of formula.
I am not a medical professional, but i do understand both statistics and the importance of scientific method.
My own conclusion: Breast milk, according to the statistics, is probably better, but not by much.
Please note: comments on this post will be heavily moderated.
Those that i've come across
Those that i've come across that can not breast feed can not get any support in learning to bottle feed. There isn't the same kind of support there available for them in New Zealand, they have to work out themselves about how you bottle feed and what forumla you use
I can understand gp, plunket, midwifes not being able to talk about brands of forumla, but there are differences in stages, what you give a newborn is not what you give a 7 month old for example.
Most people i've come across... mostly on a online forum i chat on.. that have been unable to feed for many reasons was simply told 'i can't discuss that' by the gp, midwifes/plunket
My son was 100% not breast
My son was 100% not breast fed due to various issues. I was later told by a good friend of mine, also local medical guy in charge of the area I lived in that the difference between the two was very little. I was lucky and got plenty of support but then mine's not your average every day story!
I enjoy your blog very much...always informative!
Both of my children had
Both of my children had problems maintaining weight in the first few weeks on a pure breastmilk diet. Both times the midwife eventually told us to supplement. The second time around, we didn't even feel guilty about it.
Congrats on taking such a stand publicly.
Thanks for the great post
Thanks for the great post Brenda. Very well put.
A lot of my family's personal experience with childcare professionals can be summed up with one description: "on-message". There is a message they are trained and instructed to convey, and they will deliver that message come hell or high water, with no consideration for individual circumstances.
I do feel some sympathy, in that not everyone who comes into contact with the profession is able to think through reasonable consequences and make rational decisions (e.g. not taking short-cuts with sterilisation). And unfortunately, it tends to be those people less able to understand the issue who are more susceptible (especially worldwide relating to water supply). So the end result is a binary message ("breast good, formula bad") in order to make it as simple as possible.
As you say, this message completely ignores the intricacy (and intimacy) of the situation for the majority. Catch 22?
I hope more people read your post and understand that the decision is there, and the consequences - either way - aren't doom-and-gloom as they are made out.
Ah, breastfeeding! It's
Ah, breastfeeding! It's actually the one thing I really worry about around the birth (I am due in 6 weeks time now). I (like to) think I can handle everything else, since it will not really be within control anyway, but according to so many people I have spoken to or read about, there is an armada of nurses and midwives in the hospital wanting to teach me how to breastfeed. According to the books, it may not be easy and the milk may not flow for a few days - but I would rather be prepared for that and accept that, than having the white armada squeeshing my boobs and telling me ten different ways of putting the baby there! I really really hope I will be able to say "FUCK OFF! GO AWAY!!!" to those people - but I fear my emotions may not be within my control and I may end up crying and getting frustrated in stead.
(I will blog about preparing for this during the weekend or so, I think.)
I am very curious about how you experience breastfeeding and pumping during work over the coming weeks. Going back to work after 6 weeks sounds really tough, but then I come from a country (Norway) where the norm is staying at home for a lot longer. I plan to go back to work from August, when the baby will be about 5 months, and this makes a lot of people really frown upon me - how can I do that to the baby??? The recommendation here is to only give breastmilk until 6 months - 7% do that. On the other hand 80% claim to give SOME breastmilk at 6 months. 99% get some breastmilk until they are 4 weeks, 90% are exclusively breastfed. At 4 months this drops to 44%, and it's a gradual decline, so it's not the "sudden" introduction of "otehr food from 4 - 6 months of age".
I have a flexible and nice employer, so I plan to pump or work shorter days in the beginning. My husband will be home when I am not, and continue to stay home when I transition to fulltime (I plan a 4-6 weeks period of 50% work), so I am pretty confident this will work out well. I wrote about the Norwegian benefits in my blog a few days ago: http://magnio.livejournal.com/596160.html
With regard to breastfeeding and formula, the World Health Organization promotes only breastfeeding until 6 months, and to continue giving breastmilk until the infant is 2 years. See http://www.who.int/nutrition/topics/infantfeeding/en/index.html
They have also made an international code of breast-milk substitutes, which basically forbids any marketing of formula, and all formulas should have a text saying breastmilk is superior. Given the conditions 80% of the world's women live under, I really understand their recommendations. In real life most women can't properly sanitize bottles and equipment, water can't be boiled, "tap" water is far from clean enough and the risk of the baby dying from diarrea is simply extremely high. Breastmilk solves very many of these problems, and is certainly a life-saver for most infants. I read a story about huge amounts of mercury or other heavy metals in the breast milk of women from a developing country. The level were close to health risk level, and the researchers had problems deciding how to inform the local women about this. In the end they only told about it in private hospitals, and recommended formula feeding to the women there, while the poor locals were not told about the health risks. They knew that while all women wanted the best for their children, the poor women were not ABLE to do the best for their children - they wouldn't have money for enough formula, they wouldn't have clean water, and they COULDN'T get it.
The problem is that we live in parts of the world where the hygiene side of all this can be ignored or fixed. We can read and understand instruction manuals and why it is important to follow them. Unfortunately the WHO code still applies here, so very little *information* is available on formula and formula feeding. In Norway formula is almost never given in maternity wards, and the public health nurses who visit within 2 weeks after birth will almost never never suggest formula, no matter how much the baby cries or looses weight. It's only "breastfeed more often and it will work out". Well, it may, but the mother may very well be worn out, and while breast milk is certainly good for out rich, wealthy babies too, they may equally well grow up to good, rich, wealthy citizens fed on formula.
And putting the baby to sleep on her back is probably much more efficient to prevent cot death than breastfeeding ever was...
My son was biggish when born
My son was biggish when born (9lbs 9oz) and STARVING! As well as breatsfeeding him, I spent every other waking moment expressing milk, storing any surplus in the freezer, as well as topping him up with formula - which the midwives in the hospital told me to do.
Plunket frowned at me for giving him formula, but I persevered. I don't tell many people this because of the whole 'raised eyebrow' thing, but I breastfeed him until he was two. He had breastmilk AND formula and is absolutely fine.
My motto is 'whatever works for you' - too much stress involved re expectations otherwise.
I'm not a mother 8), but
I'm not a mother 8), but friends of mine had, like Catherine, the problem that they simply couldn't keep up with their son's demand for milk with breastmilk. At two he could count to a hundred. I don't think it's damaged his IQ. He's also consistently been above the 99th percentile for height, so the whole "stunting growth"? Not so much.
We had a lactation consultant in to help my wife with some problems we had early on... hmm... this one unpacks into a real rant. My daughter was a great natural feeder. No problems there. But my wife was experiencing excruciating pain. For months. All she could get from her followup midwife, hospital midwives, and the like were variations on, "Well, harden up."
So we got a specialist ex-midwife who focuses entirely on breastfeeding; as it happened, she was able to identify a few tiny changes in baby-holding technique which made the pain go away, but she was also adamant that after months of pain, if the problem couldn't be fixed in a few weeks, "You are going over to powder. Your daughter has had most of the benefits of breastfeeding anyway, you are in constant pain and you are at risk of PND. It is far healthier for your daughter to be on a bottle with a healthy, happy mother, than breastfed by a miserable, depressed mother who associates her daughter with constant pain."
I was *extremely* unimpressed that so much of the focus of so many of the other people - many of whom are well-paid by the public health system - was so completely on "Is the baby feeding?" that they were utterly uninterested in the mother's side of it.
(FWIW I was also bottle-fed; I wouldn't latch. I geek for a living, do judo and weight training as hobbies, and I stand around 1.85m, or 6'1" if you like old measurements. As with my friends' son, not so much on the stunted growth and stupidity.)
Well spoken Brenda. I found
Well spoken Brenda. I found in our antenatal class that the focus on breastfeeding was incredibly emotive and almost certain to make anyone unable to breastfeed feel worried and guilty. The speaker (who is also our midwife) said that it was ok to lay it on thick then as we didn't yet have the babies so wouldn't get stressed. But I'm sure those words will be ringing in everyone's ears as they're going through the first few months.
I understand the desire to impress the importance of persevering and not quitting at the first minor hurdle, but I'm sure that overall the stress and worry that it will cause those who can't breastfeed for whatever reason isn't worth that delivery of "the message".
Our baby's coming this week (whether he likes it or not) and we're planning to breastfeed. But if we can't for whatever reason we won't feel at all guilty about it. As I said to my wife after the antenatal session - sure, breast milk is somewhat better than formula, but "cow's milk" is a shitload better than no milk!
Like the David F chap, I
Like the David F chap, I found the same at Antenatal classes - also blogged about it on Geekzone some of the experiences we had just after my son was born. It was the whole one-sidedness that I didn't like, not breastfeeding was almost considered evil.
Like the David F chap, I
Like the David F chap, I found the same at Antenatal classes - also blogged about it on Geekzone some of the experiences we had just after my son was born. It was the whole one-sidedness that I didn't like, not breastfeeding was almost considered evil.
Found your post: "Breast not
Found your post: "Breast not always best". http://www.geekzone.co.nz/psycik/6605
i'm happy to approve
i'm happy to approve pro-breastfeeding comments on this thread. But I'm not going to approve the ad-hominen/ad-feminem comments, or anything portraying parents who don't do it your way as evil/less-loving.. so people please give up posting those comments.
Brenda, I appreciate your
Brenda, I appreciate your clarity and frankness in this as in your other writing. I think that making an informed decision with the best of goodwill, good information and good science is the closest to the right choice that new parents have. I am close to halfway through my pregnancy so these issues are much on my mind. I value you sharing your decision-making!
you're welcome harvestbird. I
you're welcome harvestbird.
I cried when my parents bought me the breastpump -- yeah, pregnancy hormones were the reason for the tears, but i was so happy for something that represented being able to still live my own life.
I'm a firm believer that the best way to ensure your kids have a happy fulfilling life is to be that role model that also has a happy fulfilling life, as best you can. Being able to pump milk for her, and then go out somewhere to do some public speaking is what enables that.
For the record, Casey is now 99% breastfed, indirectly. I've made it to 8 weeks doing this - but if i don't get much further i'm fine with this, having looked up the reasons behind the "breast is best" and found it to be a correct message, but an incomplete message.
Thanks for continuing to blog
Thanks for continuing to blog about your motherhood experiences!
I've always thought about this as a "do the best you can" kind of issue, and not really thought about the guilt that it induces in parents. My own mother has expressed regret at not being about to breast-feed me, but having been able to with my other siblings. I actually said to her recently, "It's ok mom, I turned out fine." :)
The earlier points about the problems of using formula in areas of the world which do not have ready access to sterilized water are really important to remember when confronted by well-meaning pro-breasters! Those of us who live in places with excellent public water systems and ready access to bottled water are not in the same position of risk to their children's health.
I am interested if you find further research on this subject. The hearsay I've heard concerns immune system development - that mothers transfer immune boosting "something" in the breast milk, and also that breast-feeding fosters greater mother-child attachment.
The digestion one was a new one for me - I'd often heard that babies drink formula more quickly (because of bottle design? which probably has been somewhat fixed with Technology at this point), which can lead to eating too much (and the resulting spit-up etc). No idea whether that's true either, though :)
Don't throw the baby out with
Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater :-)
"formula is not the evil some people think it is"
The problem is, that it certainly has been evil in the past. The formula companies spent vast sums of money marketing substandard products and painting breast feeding as dirty and evil. They particularly did (and still do) this is 3rd world countries. They still do command much greater forces in their favour than public health services.
NZ is still quite unique in its grass roots support for breast feeding and it would be a shame to loose that support.
That said, everything is about balance. In the end, parents work out what is best for them and their situations. Happy is so much a part of healthy that it should not be scarified due to peer pressures.
Very good point. I'd like to
Very good point. I'd like to be a responsible consumer and boycott the formula makers who still practice advertising their product in in-appropriate circumstances. For example, the manufacturer of our breast pump is one of those still advertising where they shouldn't. I wish I'd known that before sending them money.
But no matter how polluted water supply is elsewhere in the world, that's not reasoning enough, imo, for harsh statements that even this blog post is attracting. e.g. One person is repeatedly posting his/her reasons why those that don't breastfeed clearly don't love their children like they do. A half dozen other comments have arrived on all the terrible things that are going to happen to our children because we once fed them formula.
What fuels this behaviour?
But no matter how polluted
But no matter how polluted water supply is elsewhere in the world, that's not reasoning enough, imo, for harsh statements that even this blog post is attracting.
It's is, I think, a general problem that while "true believers" are the backbone of change and progress, because they're the people who are the kind of bull-headed evangelists you need to kick off change, they become a liability in the long run, as behaviours which are helpful in kicking out the first few bricks of a bad structure become toxic when trying to build the new ones.
What fuels this behaviour?
The whole topic of parenting seems to be incredibly prone to it, unfortunately. Remember the big fuss over some DomPost survey trumpeting "One Parent Should Stay At Home Say Kiwis?", or the general rounds of "Parents today suck, not like the parents of my day" stories that do the rounds. Feh.
(What's worse, though, is that it's such an easy habit to fall into. One minute you're complaining about people being cocks about parenting, the next minute you find yourself thinking, "What are you doing? YOU ARE THE WORST PARENT IN THE WORLD!" about something that doesn't actually matter.)
I just thought I'd comment on
I just thought I'd comment on the topic of plunket/hospital/etc all not being prepared to officially support formula for babies.
The reason we were told when in hospital with our first child was that the World Health Organisation has taken the breast is best stance. This is due to a number of issues in 3rd world countries where people were feeding their babies formula, but unable to sterilise the bottles and teats. This led to many many sick babies. (Sorry, no reference at hand.)
To combat this WHO introduce the baby-friendly hospital initiative:
http://www.euro.who.int/nutrition/Infant/20020730_2
Part of this requires that hospitals actively discourage the use of formula for feeding newborns. This includes hospitals in New Zealand. Even though we have very good hygiene here.
The good news is that a number of hospital midwifes are pragmatic about this, and recognise that sometimes formula is the best option.
Likewise with nipple shields. My wife had a terrible time feeding our first child until one of the hospital midwifes suggested she used nipple shields and brought her a couple. This made feeding our first child a completely different experience, and something that was suddenly no longer painful. She never looked back.
Brilliant post! You have
Brilliant post! You have taken such an intelligent, educated stance on what is a very controversial matter, and I want to commend you for that. I especially appreciate your comments about pseudo-science and the misreporting of breastfeeding stats. I could not agree more. I have an entire blog about this subject, and have covered a bunch of the studies and issues you are referring to - I'd love to have you come on board as we have some really great discussions to which I think you could add a great deal. And coincidentally, I will be posting a guest post from a reader from New Zealand tomorrow with her take on the breastfeeding pressure in your country.
Regardless - thank you for putting this out there. The more rational, witty and informed commentary is out there, the more the guilt and shame of formula feeding will abate. You are doing women a great service by putting this into the blogosphere! Rock on, momma.
I sort of had the opposite
I sort of had the opposite problem, with my first child (I'm now pregnant with my second). Here in the UK, the wrong growth charts have been used up until very recently - in fact, in many cases are still being used. Breastfed babies have been measured according to charts which included formula-fed babies, who are known to gain more weight, and more quickly. So I was constantly being told that my daughter was 'too little', 'why don't you top up with formula?' etc etc. It was hard to resist this pressure, especially when the professionals made vague comments about 'not wanting to have to take this further'.. so I did supplement with formula, a little, albeit reluctantly.
I'm now pregnant again, and things have changed. I've now seen the World Health Organisation chart that my daughter *should* have been measured on: she was in the 13th centile on it, rather than being almost off the bottom of the chart inflicted on me. I also know now that even small amounts of formula will adversely affect the baby's gut flora. And I realise that despite the things I was told, there's no evidence to suggest that formula will help a baby to sleep better.
I don't begrudge any parent the decisions they make about infant feeding. But what I absolutely can't stand is the way that healthcare professionals, in the UK at least, constantly undermine breastfeeding. I shouldn't *have* to have learned this stuff myself - the midwives, doctors, and health visitors that I encountered should have known better, and should have supported me. I'm never going to forgive them, but at least I know I won't be bullied by them next time.
Of course, it's not helpful for health professionals to effectively deny the existence of formula, either - it's easy for formula to be prepared unsafely, for instance, so parents need guidance. I guess there's some sort of happy medium to be reached, here - though it sounds like both our countries are a long way from it yet :o/
I recently was a guest
I recently was a guest blogger on the Fearless Formula Feeder on this very subject. (http://fearlessformulafeeder.blogspot.com/2010/02/fff-friday-formula-fee...)
I still can't believe to this day the guilt that is inflicted on new mothers that can't or choose not to breastfeed. Like its that simple.. you do or you do not.
There will always be the
There will always be the breastfeeding vs formula debate and personally I believe breast milk is the best hence I’m still breastfeeding my 2 ½ year old BUT this doesn’t mean I think there is anything wrong with formula, it’s great that we have something available to feed our child if we can’t or choose not to breast feed whatever that reason may be. I have also used formula as top ups when my child was younger.
Once you become a parent every choice you make will have someone disagreeing with you, either publicly or not.
Drinking while pregnant or breast feeding
What you eat when pregnant
Breastfeed or Bottle feed
Circumcision or not
CIO/CC or attachment parenting
When do you start solids
What solids you give your child
What your child wears
If you let them watch TV
Do you let them eat lollies
What school you send them to
These are just some examples but as you can see it’s never ending, doesn’t matter how old your child becomes there will always be something.
The most important thing at the end of the day is do you have a happy (well most of the time) and healthy child? If the answer is YES then you’re a GOOD parent!!!
Hi Brenda A good post, I
Hi Brenda
A good post, I found it interesting how different your experience has been in Wellington vs. Dunedin. Friends of mine here who have used formula have been their own harshest critics initially, rather than the midwives and other support workers that they have come into contact with.
Unfortunately re. the formula makers who make/market their formula in inappropriate circumstances, there isn't really any (commonly available) formulas available here who aren't made by companies that practice quite dodgy marketing in third world countries. To echo what Don has said, the issue is one of balance...the marketing budgets of formula companies are vastly greater than that available for public health initiatives. An excellent doco called 'Formula for Disaster' http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNYDPKQOVUE details how the companies have been undermining initiatives from the WHO etc. For the interests of clarity, I'm a Nutrition student at Otago, and our lecturer played this documentary in our Lifecourse Nutrition paper last year, which is how I came across it.
I can second puck's post about the baby-friendly hospital initiative - that is most definitely the reason that formula and its preparation are not promoted in New Zealand hospitals. Having said that, I agree that it is ridiculous, especially given the risks associated with preparing it incorrectly, that women find it difficult to get information on how to store and prepare formula correctly.
@Selena regarding the immune-boosting 'something' that is passed to the baby - the mother passes a number of classes of immunoglobins (which are the immune system molecules which assist in the recognition and subsequent destruction of foreign substances such as bacteria in our bodies) to babies via breastmilk. In particular the colostrum (that is produced in the first few days of breastmilk production) is very rich in immunoglobulins which coat and protect the digestive tract of the baby. Breastmilk is an extremely complex mixture of fats, proteins, carbohydrates and minerals, the integration and interactions of which have not yet been fully understood (which is why you can't buy a complete breast-milk substitute from formula companies, and they've sure been looking for one). It also changes formulation not only during the period of a feed, but also as the baby grows.
The problem noted by Karen, about the growth charts being used being based on formula fed babies was the case in New Zealand until relatively recently (I'm sorry I don't have the dates to hand when the plunket growth charts were switched over - but i'm pretty sure it was only within the past 5 years) - this may have explained the issue that Matthew raised. As a result, it is also now recognised as normal that breast fed babies lose some weight in the first week or two following birth. What i find interesting about this discussion is how many things that have been (and still are) considered normal (such as a baby gaining weight steadily following birth, that a 'bonnie' baby is a healthy one, etc. etc.) were the result of the use of growth charts that were based on data collected from predominantly formula fed babies.
There's loads more I could post about this, but i'll leave the discussion running its course. But i'd like to say well done Brenda for persisting with the pumping for the past 8 weeks. I had to pump for the first 5 weeks of my boys life, and it is the most time-consuming and involved option/choice for feeding your infant (and I was in hospital for that time, so had fabulous support, the ability to take breaks etc.).
Cheers
i agree with
i agree with julie...parenting is a hotbed of arguments and people telling you or thinking you are a terrible parent and they can't believe you don't or do (insert one of many examples here) in regards to your child. my son is 16 months old and i'm still breastfeeding him. i work part-time and tried expressing when he was wee but he wasn't having a bottle and i was cool with that as i found expressing painful and that it messed with my milk supply hence i gave it up relatively quickly. the longest he is in daycare is 7 hours without milk and he survives! my boobs are certainly full and sore by the end of the day but he feeds as soon as i pick him up and that goes away very quickly. i have made a choice to let him self-wean when he is ready. i don't miss drinking (although shock horror i do have a very small amount once in a blue moon), i absolutely love the connection and feeling i get from nourishing my son and i know he loves it too. i am training to be a midwife at the moment and breastfeeding is one of my major interest areas. we have a paper called 'lactation and breastfeeding' but i'm unsure as yet if we learn about bottle feeding and how to do this. i hope so, i would be worried if we didn't as i would feel there would be something missing in my knowledge base. i will admit that i do not understand it where mothers choose not to breastfeed there baby at all, even that research-proven all important cholosterum. i guess it's kind of like having children in the first place, there are women out there that can't have children at all and so dearly want one and then there are women that irresponsibly have children when they can't cope with or afford or even seem to want to have children. and so in the case of breastfeeding, there are women that so dearly want to be able to but can't because of physical reasons. but as always, it is a women's choice as to what she does with her body and whilst i might not understand not wanting to breastfeed because of whatever the reason may be - inconvenience, work, mental/emotional, etc - i do respect her choice. i also agree that there is too much shaming and disrespect in the realm of parenting - (most) people do the best they can in the best way that they know how and with the resources that they have. it's a hard enough job raising a child as it is let alone having the way you do it judged.
Post new comment